psychiatrist Eric Berne (1910-1970) studied human
interaction

in Games People Play (1964) Berne presented his
psychoanalytic theory, "Transactional Analysis"


in this work, three concepts are central: games,
intimacy and awareness

a game is defined as a set of social interactions
that we habitually and unconsciously play out
when we interact with others

factors that motivate us to play games include:

1) the desire for - attention, stimulation, connection,
intimacy, confirmation of our assumptions, and

2 ) the desire to avoid - anxiety, responsibility and
intimacy

intimacy is a second issue that is central in
Games People Play

Berne contends that we desire intimacy; but we
find it difficult to achieve, and it causes anxiety -

anxiety because of the vulnerability that comes
with a close and intense relationship

the ambivalence we have towards intimacy leads
us to adopt and play out games,

Berne writes,

Games are a compromise between intimacy and
keeping intimacy away

Games People Play (1964) lists approximately
100 games; most are counterproductive; a few
are positive

Homely Sage is an example of a positive game,
here, the game's interactions involve giving advice
and assisting others

payoffs include attention, interaction, and validation
of oneself as useful

Homely Sage is usually played by a retired person

an example of a counterproductive game, is Harried

here, the player continually portrays himself as
swamped with responsibilities, and therefore, too
busy for intense personal involvement

payoffs for playing Harried include: positive regard
for being so busy and productive; and, more
importantly, avoidance of the anxiety associated
with intimacy

awareness, is the third issue mentioned above

in Games People Play Berne writes:

For certain fortunate people, there is something
which transcends all classifications of behavior, and
that is awareness; something which rises above the
programming of the past

with insight into our life situation, we may eventually
refrain from game playing and begin to adopt more
effective strategies to obtain involvement, connection
and intimacy